Monday 30 January 2012

Gardening Wars With Darrell And Nigel!

Green FingersGardeners Question Time
There is a robust rivalry betwixt Darrell and Nigel of an Alan Titchmarsh type variety at work at the moment
Alan Titchmarsh
Darrell has taken responsibility for the amaryllis in our office, it has a firm and strong stem and at the moment seems to grow by several centimetres a day, but is sparse in the foliage department …….Charlie Dimmock
Nigel has been awarded growers rights and tenderage of the amaryllis in the Finance Office.  His plant  is taller than Darrell’s, with two heads and a whole plethora of strong leaves.
Gardeners World
Both Darrell and Nigel are hell bent that their amaryllis will be the first to burst forth and bloom and are thus applying their own growth stimulation techniques to their said plants.  Darrell likes to stroke his stem at least once a day, encouraging it with kind words and tender looks.
Blue Peter Garden
Nigel on the other hand likes to lie back and gaze up at his burgeoning flora.  It’s almost as if he is making a spooky telepathic Derek Acorah type connection with it ……. willing it to grow and do him proud!
Rude Plant
But who’s plant is best ……..???? Potting Shed
I like Nigel’s two pronged prodigy, but on the other hand I also admire Darrell’s single thrusting shoot!  I shall keep you informed of any further developments of any blooming type nature ….. it’s all so very exciting!

6 comments:

Di said...

NO comment from me - too busy wiping the laptop screen free of spluttered tea from my morning cuppa!! I'm sayin' nuffin' lest I get barred from this blog! Di xx

Mr. D said...

Ooh err missus.
What would Frankie Howerd or the Carry On team make of it all? Suggestive photos of Nigel plus information that "Darrell likes to stoke (stroke?) his stem at least once a day."
Di - very sensible sayin' nuffin'.

Anj said...

I'm with Di on this one - best option is to say nowt and leave them to it...! x

marc said...

they are indeed very fine specimens
and they should be proud of them mine is tiny compared with those twos but then i did have it out in the cold shed for a week or two which i think had an affect on its size i will have to take a few tips from the boys and do what they do thanks for the tips boys big Showbiz wave Hugh

Anonymous said...

In the words of Dick Emery....
'Oooh you are awful.......but I like you!'
JantheFan x

Anonymous said...

Aawww, to be young and niave when one views one's amaryllis stalk and foliage with blind adoration. Don't forget some beautiful music to encourage growth. Best growy Wishes ..Dianne